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Rugrats, All yolo’d up

It’s nights like these when I get home from a night with friends that I still wind up thinking about you. I’m glad you’re happy at least. I deserve to happy too, and at times I am - but it’s still not the same giddy happiness I felt whenever I am with you.

I’m Dressed Up Just Because

I think I’m secretly wishing for you to be like First Day of my Life, driving all night to see me in the morning, meeting me at the door way between you and me, thinking everything’s strange, everything’s changed, as if you just woke up, wanting this morning to feel like a first day of your life and be happy henceforth. But I know it’s just wishful thinking that won’t come true. Maybe I’m just imagining romantic comedy scenes in my head, but it’s getting easier. I still close my eyes and hear you, even though I shouldn’t.  But with me there’s no telling, I especially am slow.

I’m feeling mighty alpha today

I’m feeling mighty alpha today

It’s not that I’m in love at the moment, in fact I’m sad but still trying to be happy. I guess I’m writing about it since I want to try describing it in beautiful ways to know I still have it in me to be happy. I think it’s working. I may not have someone to talk to at night and I may not wake up in the morning receiving a text “good morning” or someone to talk to all the time, but at least I can write about how I felt when I did. It’s as though when I was too busy actually in love I stored these poems in my head waiting for the time to actually write them down for my eyes to see and who ever glances and takes the time to read it. But I still miss having someone to always be down for a pound of shrimp and crawfish.

Do Not Whither

Your eyelashes extend like petals on a rose,

elegantly hung above a fire place, lit by the passion of eyes

and your iris colored a soft hue radiating from below.

Between the lights of your brow and the trembling of your lips,

I fell in love for a moment, holding your body

like a stem of a rose - still afraid of the thorns but holding on regardless

because sometimes all the pain becomes a fraction of what I really feel.

Everything is ignored besides what I see. And sometimes I hold you

like a tulip between fingers - tender and delicate

as you blossom into something unlike others in a meadow.

Everything is illuminated in the fire light,

especially how much my iris expands when I

loose myself in this feeling.

In The Morning, We’ll Both Be Asleep

My dear, I’ll carry you home

if your legs refuse to move.

My dear, I’ll hold your head 

if your eyes refuse to open.

My dear, I’ll brush your hair

if your body refuses to sleep.

My dear, my dear, my dear

You look so elegant tonight -

I can hear your heartbeat 

race through wind, soaring up

towards my ears, so I can feel

how you’re trying to keep on tempo.

You’re restless, my dear and I adore you.

The ball room floor spins beneath your feet

and I am lost.

My dear, I am lost

gazing at the fabric swaying left and right,

at the pearls across your neck jingle,

at your little earrings moving with you,

at your grinning eyes motioning me to join.

And we follow each step, in unison, until

no one is left

and the watch says it’s time to go, but

we stay right here until the day comes to greet

our tired bodies, entwined.

My dear, I say, I couldn’t sleep

I was too busy watching time motionless

and I have this feeling I want this to repeat

But we should save our dance for another day,

since you’re still asleep on my lap

and I know you deserve some rest.

How it feels to meet someone new

I can tell there’s something going on
Hours seems to disappear
Everyone is leaving, I’m still with you

Something We All Feel At Some Point

Sometimes all I really want to feel is love
Sometimes I’m angry that I feel so angry
Sometimes my feelings get in the way
Of what I really feel I needed to say

I think the only time I lied to you was yesterday when I said I didn’t want to be with you. I only said it because I know it’s how I should actually think